As Told By Felicia

It's been a hot minute since we've talked books on this little blog of mine. I had a slumpy period from April to June but I'm back baby, and loving alllll the juicy thrillers! Here is what I read from March to June.  Radiance was a really sweet fantasy friends to lovers romance story. Super sweet, swoony, and overall enjoyable. It was a good break from the darker books I had been reading.  Shortly after Radiance , I went on a historical romance kick. I love that genre because it is almost like a fantasy story to me. They are a great escape from the day to day bullshit we all deal with.  Temptations of a Wallflower was about a female erotic author who writes under a psuedonym and a vicar who secretly reads her work, unaware of who the author really is. They meet and fall in love. So cute.  Again the Magic was a second chance romance about a woman and man in two different social classes, and how they overcome their past and societal expectations to be together. I loved this

If you and I had coffee, we would likely get a table outside. Mask mandates have been lifted here, so we would be able to feel a bit "normal" while sitting at a coffee shop with our drinks. I would probably put way too much creamer or syrup in my coffee, and you'd tease me and ask if I want some coffee with my cream. I'd roll my eyes but laugh because you're right. I love me a good indulgent coffee. It's the one "unhealthy" thing I won't budge on.  We would catch up, since it's probably been a really long time since we have gotten together in person. We'd agree that while facetime/ Zoom chats were an okay substitute, nothing compares to face-to-face girl time.  I'd tell you about how the weight on my shoulders feels a bit less "heavy" even though every now and again there are still some really dark days. I would admit that though they don't come as frequently anymore, they do come out of the blue. I'd talk about how

 I am proud of myself.  It's been a while since I have said or thought this about myself: I'm really proud of Me.  For moving my body, spending time outside, taking the time to do my hair, picking out outfits I feel pretty in, opening the curtains to let the light in the house.  I'm proud of myself for trying my best to smile more, journaling when I need to, listening to audiobooks and turning off the TV, trying to keep in touch with friends, being productive at work, leaving the house, staying on top of laundry and dishes, making my relationship with my husband a priority.  Because for a while there, I honestly didn't think I would make it.  And when I get to that dark place again (because I know I will, Grief is a bitch), I will have this side of me to remind myself: YOU can do hard things.  You can live your life while still loving your daughter from afar. Isabela is so proud of you, Mommy.